The Post That You've Secretly Been Waiting For

This will be my post about things I really hate about Korea. Or at least Jeju. Jeju is its' own self-governing province, so to compare it to the rest of Korea is a little unrealistic. Jeju has less English than the rest of the mainland, and they are more conservative and set in their ways than the mainland. To what extent they are different, is hard for me to gadge as I haven't spent any time on the mainland. But after complaining to my Seoul friend about the things in Jeju, it was clear that much of it was a Jeju thing. That I wouldn't find these problems in Seoul.

Things I HATE About Korea!

Mosquitoes. They're not like Canadian ones. They're smart. They don't make any sound when flying and there is always ONE hidden in my room. Hello mosquitoes bites on my ass, breast, knuckles, palm.... you name it. Today it was the face. ARG! Why my face!? And where are you hiding!?!!

I Smell Like Kimchi. Once you start eating the food here, every bowel movement, every natural scent from your body smells like fermented ingredients of kimchi!! My farts, my pee, bowel movements, EVERYTHING smells like bloody fermented kimchi. If you think this is disgusting to hear, it is disgusting to experience! It is one of the most disturbing things I have ever witnessed.

I Have to Mispronounce my Own Language. That 'French Kiss' sushi roll I so love is now ordered as French-e Kissu rolle. You know how westerners always get those Chinese tattoos thinking it looks super cool? Same with Koreans and the English written language. So there is a lot of English, but they pronounce it so completely different that for me to pronounce it correctly would lead to confusion. Sometimes I just want a bloody hot chocolate without struggling to figure out which retarded mispronounciation they'll understand...

Korean Driving Is The Most Frightful Thing I Have Ever Witnessed. Jessssus Christ. Yes I have almost been hit by scooters and cars multiple times WHILE WALKING ON THE SIDEWALK. Scooters are the worst. The damn drivers always slip past all the cars so that they're at the front of any 4-way, and they think that a sidewalk is just a shortcut. I've actually been warned to not walk down the sidewalk while listening to music, or I may not hear the scooter from behind me and get out of his way. I can't explain it... It makes one too speechless to put it into words.

Finally the #1 Thing I Can't Stand About Jeju!

I am Stared at like an Animal in a Zoo. Anywhere you walk in Jeju, people stare at you. Older men tend to be the worst, and definitely hit a level of creepy I don't want to describe. I've had old men suddenly stop walking and start watching me randomly in the street. Some people stare because they're curious, but often there isn't the most friendly expression behind their eyes. The worst is at night, when the men have been drinking. I've been walking home alone at night and have had 2 drunk men start slurring out English to me and laughing. Very creepy. In Korean society it IS rude to stare, so it really pisses me off when they stare at us. Particularly since, while English teachers is rather new, there are TONS of us around. We aren't the first white person they've seen.

There you go. I know you all wanted to know this secretly. There are other things, but I tried to keep it light-hearted and not too serious for the most part.